sh1njuk1: (Default)
 Interesting day today! 

Over the course of the day, the worries lessened gradually about the upcoming Amazon thing... I'm mostly calm about it now. Mostly. Though I admit I did wake up a few times with them on the previous night, so there's that. 

I think both the other cards weren't about me at all, but my friend Cory. The Hierophant reversed represented me, offering him the chance at doing a banishing spell, from a source outside of all official tradition. He took all my books pretty eagerly and I think he'll at least give it a chance. So... the Jack of Clubs would be him :)

After this long, hot day, let's do a divination and get to bed!

Me: 8 of Diamonds REVERSED - NO comfort achieved through hard work and persistence

Situation: 5 of Spades REVERSED - NO possible disappointment, powerful opponent

Outcome: King of Spades - Wisdom, Authority, a man in charge. 

My guess about this... I'm not going to be very comfortable tomorrow, lol. Not too surprising given the heat! The situation card to me suggests "nothing happens". And the outcome card... hmm. This card seems to represent me expressing spiritual authority (even if only to the tomatoes). I wonder if I'll finally start to get traction on the next part of the Druid path sometime tomorrow? Once I survive the heat, that is! :)


sh1njuk1: (Default)
 Kid is splashing about in the bath, gonna try and get this in...

Things went in an interesting direction today which I did not expect!

First things first, I presumed that I would be representing Imagination when I took my son to the dinosaur museum today... but whoops, it turned out to be New Feelings instead, because they were big scary animatronics that terrified him! I presumed it would be more kid-friendly... alas, I was wrong. I think dinosaurs will be less popular for a while....

And then the big event of the day turned out to be Amazon summoning me to return (all but), and it being too good a deal to dismiss. So... there's the career advancement part of the King of Hearts, the exact last thing that I expected from that card. Mike (the romantic man of my life) couldn't hide how happy he was at the news. I am... more divided. (Perhaps the 7 of Hearts, in the end, represented "choices"??) I might want to journal about that at length later on. 

The Star was not clear to me at first, given how jumbled I am about the Amazon thing (and uncertain that it will represent 'health and healing') but then I started putting together some information about banishing spells for Cory and realized that there's hope here that this will be one of the keys for him to start improving his life. He seems ready, from our conversation yesterday. Hope! Healing!! :)

Onto the divination... busy, hot day tomorrow. 

Me: 9 of Clubs REVERSED - NO struggle to make sense of things, no staying awake at night

Situation: 5 of Diamonds (The Hierophant) REVERSED - NO tradition, spiritual authority, deception (alternatively, no being thrown out into the cold from something I'd belonged to)

Outcome: Jack of Clubs - The enthusiastic pursuit of a new venture. 

You know... sometimes I wonder. I did mention in the conversation with the cards that if I got the Amazon job, the first thing I would do would be to buy them a nice silk covering. And two of these cards strongly point me towards "OK, then go do that!! Don't worry about it, and get hopping!" I wonder...

Anyway, the Hierophant reversed suggests that teaching the banishing spell to Cory will not go well. Or it will go well, because it isn't traditional...? In any case our friendship seems likely to be fine :)

And... that's enough. Time to haul the kid out of the bath. Hope he didn't get too wrinkly!
sh1njuk1: (Default)
Late again - but a little less my fault this time; we had a power outage until about 8 this morning! All is back up now, and we slept *very* well without the lights and the screens... but it was a sobering reminder of the future.

Anyway, the divination, again, was a slam dunk. I feel like I was both healed from the lingering cold, and I hopefully gave some hope in a comment I wrote late yesterday to another occult practitioner too (telling them memories of my own past life, which their current life reminds me of in some ways). I moved closer to a community instead of away - both online, and with our friend Cory. The outcome care could have been a few different things, or perhaps all of them: our gift is going to give Cory a boost on his date today (I got him The Five Love Languages - turns out his date had literally asked him about that in the introductory message!), we admired the stunning backgrounds of Kiki's Delivery Service together until the power went out, and I admired Mike's calmness in finding all the flashlights after that.

I did the divination by candlelight last night, so will record the outcome now.

Me: Jack of Hearts - Unconscious Thoughts Coming To The Surface, Contemplation

Situation:5 of Hearts REVERSED - NOT learning from mistakes or moving forward

Outcome: 2 of Spades (The Hanged Man) REVERSED - NOT peace through self discipline, going to be distracted

Sigh... this is a mixed one :/ Part of me wonders: can I take this as a warning, instead of a prediction? I suppose I could try. I don't mind being a contemplative person today - I often am - but I strongly prefer to move forward and learn from mistakes, so we'll see how that wraps up. I wonder if setting myself a goal this evening to achieve something would be possible? I'd like... let's see... to get out the emails for all who RSVP'd on the Portland meet-up, and perhaps even to finish my candidacy statement for Druidry. Let's weigh that intention against the divination, and see which wins, eh? ^^;
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This is... a late post!! Which is to say, of course, the previous divination was dead-on, 100%.

Daycare was cancelled first thing in the morning and the rest of the day was one hell of a scramble. We went to the zoo and that was fine, mostly because once we were in the zoo, I could just walk along a set path with him in the stroller. (NO focus or clarity, Ace of Spades.) I got some calls from recruiters but hung up without answering them, as I just Could Not Deal. (NO advancing in my career, 3 of Clubs.) And Mike chose to call several family members later in the evening to set up our summer schedule, always somewhere between a chat and a battle. (2 of Clubs)

Just as an example of how scatter-shot yesterday was: I managed to get my kid's teeth brushed, but then got distracted, fell asleep next to him, and didn't get to brush my own teeth until 3 AM in the morning. THAT kind of day. You know!

OK, it's hella late, but let's see what the cards have to say for the rest of today.

Me: 7 of Diamonds (The Star) - Hope, Healing

Situation: 5 of Diamonds (The Hierophant) REVERSED - The opposite of being thrown out of community

Outcome: 3 of Diamonds - Craftsmanship, Successful Collaboration, Admiration

Oh, thank goodness! This is a much, much better day :) I can see that I will be cheerful and continue to heal - hopefully today will be the day that I consider the lingering cold I have had BEAT! The Hierophant/5 of Diamonds reversed suggests that I will be drawn closer into community as we celebrate our friend Cory's birthday <3 As for what I will collaborate on, or build, or admire... I look forward to finding out! :)
sh1njuk1: (Default)
OK, this one will be really fast, I am exhausted. Today had a few mysteries I can't find the energy to fully investigate.

Jack of Diamonds - best guess is that this is me, struggling to make Indian food tonight. I certainly learned some things!

Hierophant - doesn't seem to have applied. I should really look up the traditional 5 of Diamonds meaning, as that is also a possibility in this combined deck.

The Hanged Man - I remember now that originally, I drew him the wrong way up... for some of the cards in this deck, reversal is possible. So that means I did NOT gain peace because I did NOT practice self-discipline. That's... about right really! I didn't get my evening routine done because I was too ambitious for tonight (last night's??) dinner!

Let's give it a shot for tomorrow.

Me: King of Spades (The Emperor) - Wisdom, Experience, Authority.

Situation: 7 of Clubs, reversed - NO Vigilance, Struggle to Stay Ahead

Outcome: 8 of Hearts (The Moon) - Subtlety, Mystery, Instinct

Hmm... a nice spread of cards! Here's a small story. I use my Authority as someone who arranges meet-ups to continue to clinch the Ecosophian meet-up tomorrow. I don't bother to struggle to stay ahead tomorrow, I do the minimum on the job hunt and move right along. Towards the end of the day I indulge in learning about Mystery by reading the James book "Religious Experiences".

That... would be a nice day. We shall see!
sh1njuk1: (Default)
Yep... another bang-on reading. It occurred to me in the middle of the day that a veritable string of Diamonds indicates a day focused on prosaic, down-to-earth matters of the home, and that's exactly what today was... exactly.

Eventually this will stop being eerie. Eventually.

3 of Diamonds - I collaborated with Mike to make sure our household was well-supplied, and with some Ecosophians to move forward the group meet-up in Portland.

2 of Diamonds - Today was all about juggling, in the way that most household chores days are.

Ace of Diamonds - I am currently sitting here with a feeling of great peace, thanks to all the advancements I pushed forward today. I feel like the card makes me feel <3

OK... let's get ready for a Monday.

Me: Jack of Diamonds - Fascination, Wonder, Scholarship

Situation: 5 of Diamonds (The Hierophant) - Tradition, Spiritual Authority, Deception

Outcome: 2 of Spades (The Hanged Man) - Peace through Self-Discipline, Freedom from Distraction

The Hierophant keeps showing up in my draws... I wish he wouldn't :/ But - there's a reason I keep drawing him. So it goes, sigh.

Here's my narrative: I approach tomorrow with an interest in learning (perhaps I'll go get The Druidry Handbook tomorrow, for instance!) Actually that works very well with the Hierophant - the Handbook is ostensibly a work of great authority, if it gets into my hand tomorrow, that's the situation right there. And the Hanged Man... perhaps I will feel satisfied that I had the self-discipline to get anything done? We'll see!

And now... to bed :)
sh1njuk1: (Default)
A quick review!

I feel like getting the Hierophant was, in the end, a warning - a warning not to go back on what I declared before the gods. I deleted my brief summary of the issue I'd promised I would not talk about again, and continue to let it be water off my back :) Had a pretty nice day overall as a result!

I'm a bit confused about the Tower card, but perhaps the fact that I had a genuine and happy turning towards being social (sent off a message to a group that wants to meet up! <3) whereas I had been feeling "I have no choice but to stay alone, for my own safety..." was a small example of type. Also, I felt a bit cheerful about potentially continuing with an interview process, instead of sullen dread. Another nice change of pace!

The Sun - for the first time, I put in print that I am "moving towards being a stay-at-home mom for a while." That's definitely a new life for me. I have thought for a decade that it would be a terrible choice. But right now... it seems most days like the best possible path. We will see! Also if that interview goes much further, it could mark the beginning of that.

Daily div!

Me: Ace of Spades - Focus, Clarity

Situation: King of Hearts - Sensitivity and Creativity channeled into Professional Success

Outcome: 7 of Hearts - Secrets, Imagination, New Feelings

First thought: Hooray! I'm going to actually get stuff done tomorrow! :) I don't know what the King of Hearts event will be - perhaps it will come out of all my job hunt stuff. Perhaps it will be as simple as completing my job hunt stuff, lol. And the new feelings... will my libido finally come back?? LOL! Hoping to leave the drama behind (finally, there are no Major Arcana... WHEW) and have a nice, productive day tomorrow :)
sh1njuk1: (Default)
Welp... I can't predict the events to save my life... but the cards, they do align.

Of course the Me card for today was Death. And - it was correct. I wrote a THIRD reflection on my interactions with the protests in Portland last summer, and sent it to JMG as a private message. No more need, FINALLY, to go into that much of a fourth - I have now spent over 24 hours aggressively processing what I now recognize as a big lump of trauma from just one, just ONE, of the many events of 2020 that came at me at approximately 1000 miles an hour, and completely reshaped my view of the world and my role in it. One I even kind of forgot about until JMG brought it (and all the trauma) right back up, lol!

[Deleted upon further reflection. I made a promise that I would write no more about it, and take on no further karma from last year's events. And so, I will not. Moving on! :)]

I've used JMG and his blog copiously to get me through this mini-crisis, and now that it's over, I'm a bit embarrassed about that. But - I'm literally converting to the dude's religion! He owes me a freebie!! And of course, I won't post anything else on any of his blogs for the next indefinite period of time. But I've managed both to process the whole trauma in a single lump, and not to hold a grudge against the guy who deeply, but also Aspergers-ly, insulted my honor while I was undergoing that. That's **great**. That's the power of the Death card.

Also... it was good to take him down a peg in my esteem. He's just a person, who can be an asshole like any other. He's not my friend. He's not even my guru, not really - he's more of a doorway, through which I can walk, and finally get started on the work I am meant to do in this lifetime. And that's more than enough.

The King of Diamonds - I ended up finding happiness in my spirituality, by overcoming the first serious challenge to it (I even declared my honesty before the gods, and asked to be cursed if I told a single lie, and with great effort, I finally told my story with **searing** self-honesty) and celebrated by finally adding a second element to my daily SOP. It's been an entire month since I added the first... I'm honestly wondering if there was THAT much crud in my mental world, that I had to banish off, before I could manage to memorize what was - honestly - not that much text.

The Queen of Diamonds - wow - I did achieve, through all this, a bond between the internal and external. A fusion of two parts of me, the liberal-leaning woman raised in Portland, and the rational mind I have spent so many years cultivating telling me that it was time to move on from that. And so I am.

Honestly this is almost creepy. But - I am so grateful to my cards, for guiding me so well through this part of my life. And it's been... a week? A week! A week 0_0

Uh... let's do tomorrow's, huh?

Me: The Hierophant - Tradition, Spiritual Authority, Deception

Situation: 6 of Clubs (The Tower) - A Revelation or Drastic Shift in Perspective

Outcome: 9 of Clubs (The Sun) - Clarity, Simplicity, New Life

Hoo boy. Well... I am not going to work too hard at predictions just yet... I will try to fall to the tradition/spiritual authority side and not the deception side (though I need to apply for jobs tomorrow, so who knows?), I will keep my mind open in preparation for the Tower - not all my revelations I've had have been terrible, many have been quite the opposite, so this could be the same - and I very much like the outcome. Will it be connected to the Tower event, or will it just be "Megan cooks a nice dinner from that Mennonite cookbook"? I guess we'll find out!
sh1njuk1: (Default)
I think that I am... an amateur, totally, at this divination thing. LOL!

I suppose I understand well enough what the Me card meant - I've been making more progress these past few days, I believe, on my spiritual practices, which I associate with Mystery for sure. The situation - secrets, new feelings - I had an interesting mental moment of crankiness where I mentally cursed out a former friend of mine. I'd been holding myself back (mentally) from really going all out on my full judgment of her - I guess I let go a bit, and imagined myself telling her the truth until she cried. Then... I was free of it, finally, and felt honestly "She doesn't deserve that - her karma is more than enough..." Perhaps that was the "situation". But certainly, it will remain a secret.

But the outcome - I don't know. Spiritual Authority? Deception? I can't see the connection. So... I have a long, long way to go.

I think I'll need to do at least 6 months of this, daily, before I'll be able to draw the connections between the cards and the events for things to start to make sense. But hey - I got the time, I got the time :) I'll tag the names of the cards here as well, so that I can look back and evaluate patterns over time...

Another change - I am going to do divinations in the evening from here on out, so that I can have the cards on my mind as I sleep.

Me: 5 of Clubs (The Devil) - Temptation, Attachment, Control

Situation: 4 of Clubs - Solid Foundations, Stability, Celebration

Outcome: 2 of Spades (The Hanged Man) - Peace through Self-Discipline, Freedom from Distraction

Hmm... so my plans for tomorrow are to apply for jobs in the AM, and finish my bird book review in the PM. I can definitely see how I've been relating to the Devil card lately - I'm working through my intense wish that society and others (like the Agency) could have worked out how I WANTED them to work out... but of course, that's not how things go. I need to move past that. The solid foundations/stability: I will also go shopping for the rest of the food? But I like that outcome... I want to get a good chunk of work done on my Druidry path, and if I can self-discipline myself enough to make it happen, I will indeed achieve a lot of peace.

Onward to tomorrow!
sh1njuk1: (Default)
Yesterday's reading was... VERY accurate, as accurate as the previous day's was wrong! :) I think the lesson I will take from this is "take cards from the top of the stack, not the middle."

I celebrated the ability to take a BREAK, from both a long and hard trip up to see family and from the increasingly gnarly issue of being associated with the co-working agency. I absolutely practiced temperance and moderation, by taking things vewy vewy slowly to continue healing from this surprisingly tenacious cold. And in return... I was able to cancel the agency, and write emails to 2 of JMGs frequent commentators, which I had not been able to push myself to do earlier - all of them freighted with many emotions, yet I believe I wrote them calmly and appropriately - emotional flow :)

That was a much better outcome - let's do another one for today!

Me: 8 of Hearts, The Moon - Subtlety, mystery, instinct.

Situation: 7 of Hearts - Secrets, Imagination, New Feelings.

Outcome: 5 of Diamonds, The Hierophant - Tradition, Spiritual Authority, Deception.

Hmm. Now, this is an interesting one (and makes me a bit nervous, honestly)...

I am going to guess that today, I will be moving through the world on instinct. Maybe I will be taking a walk around Hawthorne as we visit it today - maybe I'll go to that back-theater bar at McMenamins? I am honestly not sure how the 7 of Hearts will apply to our plans today - I will need to keep my instincts turned up high and see. The 5 of Diamonds... my scariest card... eep. I wonder who is going to show up to re-institute tradition? Unfortunately, the most likely source is Cory. Sigh. But... he has the right to argue his view, and I can certainly let him have a win today. That's not the worst thing.

Let's see how today goes.

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